Loosely translated: “Sometimes, / When I look deep in your pants, / I swear I can see your soul.”
Ha ha! Just kidding. But remember that terrible song “Sometimes” by that medium-terrible band, James? James: because what the world needs now is more Irishmen singing. He didn’t actually say “pants,” but it would have been a better song if he had. Hey, and look, it’s a bunch of guys wearing dresses! I suppose this is all my fault, too. Not the bananas, though.
In the past week, there has been a lot of soul-searching. Unfortunately, it’s mostly been people searching each other’s souls and — you’ll never guess! — finding them wanting.
I, of course, am not guilty of this. No, I certainly haven’t spent the last several days wrapped in a semi-hysterical nimbus of self-righteousness. I haven’t been following my husband around and making him reassure me, over and over and over again, that I’m a perfectly good wife most of the time. My prayer life hasn’t consisted mostly of, “Did you hear that guy?!?”
Well, just to show that I can be old-fashioned, too, let’s go back in time and revisit and old game — and do a little soul-searching of our own souls for a change. Not such a scenic route, is it? I think there’s a whole series of books out on it by now, and I remember that Ironic Catholic had a contest at one point. It’s so much fun: Six Word Autobiographies.
Here are the ones I came up with a few years ago:
Last I checked, I deserve less.
Still a bum, just much busier.
I’ve secretly always wanted a dog.
Seven unmedicated births, fine; telephones, terrifying.
Married to Bach, trysting with Brahms.
and my favorite:
Help! Help, help, help! Oh, thanks.
Okay, so what are yours? Your life in six words. Go!
To quote 101 Dalmations: “I’m hungry Mama, I really am” (that’s either me talking or my kids, but sums up about 85% of the thoughts in my life)
I meant to, but I forgot.
And
Filthy house, but lots of books.
Yeah, those two pretty much so sum me up.
I never got around to it.
Not clever enough to do this.
I doubt it’s the baby’s fault.
So many blogs; so little time!
Managing crises of my own making.
I have two:
Why did I open my mouth.
Where the hell are my keys.
Yes, I have counted every entry.
-My kids scream I need coffee
(no punctuation b/c both interpretations are correct! 😉 )
-None of us can focus today
-The best days include a playground
– Brilliant light breaks through cloudy blankets
-Sunshine Already? Please, God, hit snooze!
-I started today completely behind schedule.
Fun Game! It’s almost like a “Bumper Sticker” generator! 🙂
Loneliness was my greatest fear. Ha!
That’s a good one, Abby.
Hmm: “I wish I had a blog.”
Or, to tweak your blog’s title: “I have to sit down. Opps.”
It may not be rule-compliant, but as “a bear with very little brain,” I’ll borrow a couple of lines that pretty much sum up my life:
“Animal crackers and cocoa to drink”
or, from the heart of Robert Louis Stevenson’s “The Swing”:
“Til I can see so wide.” That one works for me, even if the whole poem always makes me feel a bit unsteady (as poems sometimes do).
It’s in one of these boxes.
(Is that six, or technically seven?)
After all, tomorrow is another day.
Why are there no wine coupons?
oh, how could I forget:
Your underwear is in the dryer
Me?! Really?! What is God thinking???
So many little souls. So stressed.
So many little souls. So blessed.
These are my life’s basic thoughts, on a rotating schedule.
Don’t actually remember the song, which is shocking for me… maybe it’s clouded up in there with too much ‘She Talks to Angels,’ ‘I’m Too Sexy,’ and something depressing by Pearl Jam or weird by Nirvana, or whatever else I was listening to then.
I enjoyed the skirts, though – especially the guy with the oh so prescient slanted cut black one that was shredded. Nice.
I’m not done growing up yet.
No playing football in the house
I have to write six words?
Just another five minutes sleep, please.
Why can’t someone else clean up?
I should have skipped the soup.
(says she having a gluten-induced cold-sore from one gluteny-soup infraction last weekend, and had more gluteny-soup this weekend.)
Not ready to be the grownup!
That works for most of my life, especially right now when I’m feeling ill and yet get to be the caregiver for the rest of the (ill) family. Gosh I’d love for someone to tuck me in with a good book and a cup of tea.
Was I supposed to do that?
But…but I did everything right!
I can’t function without an answer.
My shortcomings far exceed wearing pants.
If intentions are pavers, I’m screwed.
I need to cheer up, already!
The Lord was merciful to me.
So that’s what the problem was!
i must replace remorse with action.
Ooh, that’s a good one, Sarah!
What the heck is that smell?
You’re going where, for how long?
We’re moving where, for how long?
Get that out of here, now! (no kidding, I just now said that!)
I am broken, God Help me.
I’m not stuck-up, just introverted. (I don’t know whether “I’m” and “stuck-up” count as one or two each. Surely it averages out.)
Terra Sancta fills up my house. (No really, I live in the Holy Land. :))
You do what you have to. (That one comes from my great-grandmother, actually; single mother of eight.)
Pick it up, put it away.
Easy won’t really make me holy.
Where on earth…? Oh, never mind.
That’s Dr. Mama to you kid.
That’s good, Renee!
Taking it all way too seriously.
(Love this idea!)
Next time it will be perfect.
I’m loved more than I deserve.
(Bears2Cross, I’m counting contractions as one word. 🙂 )
Hey, I loved James! (And “Sometimes” wasn’t their best effort, but I liked it pretty well.)
Who’s going to clean this house?
I wanted to be good. Once.
Hope 8 kids is enough sanctity.
Home school is from the devil.
Lady pants are from the devil.
Of course that would start fights.
bwahahahaha!
I, not the pope, judge Orthodoxy. 😉
Like Jim, I’d jumped, it seemed. (all right, that doesn’t sum up my _whole_ life, but this does:) Why can’t I sing like Aretha?! (and so does this:) Lord, get me off my butt!
Older; hope I’m much wiser now.
I never said I ENJOYED cooking.
Fat — it’s not a good look.
Our grandchildren will love us regardless!
You can’t chew gum while crying.
No wet towels in the hamper!
What? Morning already? What’s the rush?
What? Bedtime already? What’s the rush?
No more apologies for being introverted.
So, so blessed. Thank you God.
It is happy hour somewhere y’all.
(the y’all is obviously filler)
Kate, I seriously JUST saw your post. Cheers!
I never thought I’d be here.
(Catholic, homeschooling, mom….not any of it. I really can’t believe I’m here.)
Fiat. *fiat*. Fiat? fiiiaaatt. FIAT. whatever.
It’s 5 o’clock somewhere, right? Cheers!
These are great. So many bumper stickers for my life!
It’s not all about you, dear.
(Jesus tells me that more than I say it to my children; I suppose I should cut them more slack for not listening when I do such a sad job of it myself…)
when did i get a minvan?
just thought of another one i say almost daily…
where did i leave my coffee?
Forty no longer seems that old.
I must be doing it wrong.
Age is supposed to mellow? Ha!
Well, that’s good. I’m in love with an almost-forty-year-old.
Not what I was – Thank God.
Remember that this too shall pass.
Always feel like I’m messing up.
We need to focus. Ooh! Shiny!!!
As I was reading this I said out loud for only the second time today, but really I say this daily –
“Please don’t hit me with that.”
Need to get off my ass.
Southern Autumn is far too hot!
Honey, the laundry won’t do itself.
We give thanks for sister tea.
Thank God I got over it.
New reader here; I’m so glad that found your blog! Tho it’s a little late, I’d like to give this a try. Read? Here goes:
OH NO!!!! Wait, nevermind. Short-lived crisis.
New reader here; I’m so glad that found your blog! Tho it’s a little late, I’d like to give this a try. Ready? Here goes:
OH NO!!!! Wait, nevermind. Short-lived crisis.