1. I had to post this here, because some of the quotes would probably be inappropriate for the Register.

    Quotes that sum up each presidential candidate:

    Rick Perry – “I can no longer sit back and allow Communist infiltration, Communist indoctrination, Communist subversion and the international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids.”

    Newt Gingrich -“Well, I, uh, don’t think it’s quite fair to condemn a whole program because of a single slip-up, sir.”

    Rick Santorum – “General Turgidson! When you instituted the human reliability tests, you *assured* me there was *no* possibility of such a thing *ever* occurring!”

    Ron Paul – “Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here! This is the war room.”

    Michele Bachmann – “Colonel! Can you possibly imagine what is going to happen to you, your frame, outlook, way of life, and everything, when they learn that you have obstructed a telephone call to the President of the United States? Can you imagine? Shoot it off! Shoot! With a gun! That’s what the bullets are for, you twit!”

    Jon Huntsman – “This is my only line.”

    Mitt Romney – ” Unfortunately there is one thing standing between me and that property: the rightful owners.”

    Barack Obama – “I want you to round up every vicious criminal and gunslinger in the west…I want rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers, and Methodists.”

  2. why didn’t you nail Romney for being a weird kind of polytheist who believes
    god the father was born on some planet and traveled to earth and had sex with the Blessed Virgin Mary? I’m voting for Paul if I get the chance but to me that craziness matters more than whether or not someone admires Abe Lincoln

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